'Arranged Marriage' goes hi-fi!

Note: The following is written in light vein. I have nothing against the process of arranged marriage. This is just a personal view of the modern transformation of the traditional arranged marriage.

I don't think your parents like it too much if you are single and happy and importantly, a girl at 24 . I mean, they do the best they can to pretend they are really ok with the situation and that they will give you "all the time in the world that you require" to deal with it... But in reality, they aren't ok and at best, "all the time in the world" is about 2 months before the topic is broached again.

I have had my share of 'putting it away', of making thesis the biggest burden that humanity saw, of claiming 'I dont have the time for all this 'nonsense''. I held on to this for quite sometime. My parents were really better off than many others I know. But they weren't really different. I dont know about the other communities, but if you TamBrahm, you are likely to know that 'The Hindu' Matrimony and tamilmatrimony are your sworn enemies with huge listings of all the eligible people in the required caste. Having done the procedure through and through for a close relative, I am very familiar with the 'chevvai doshams', and what nakshatram wont go with what and all other stuff, which I dont know why, people believe in. I guess its just a filter, an excuse to use, a weapon importantly. Instead of blatantly saying that your daughter didnt like their son's looks, you'd rather polishedly say -"Oh, with our astrologer, the horoscopes didnt match". That beats all reason. How.. how can 2 horoscopes produce different results with different astrologers? Where then is the credibility for the process??? Given a choice, I'd avert all this for sure! I mean, PLEASE!

Then comes the unavoidable close relative circle, the people you really like, your mamas-mamis, athais-athimbers, chithis-chitappas (ok u get the picture!) They're all oh-so-great, till you're a girl at 24 and unmarried! Then all you get is - "Eppo settle aaga pore?" - *(@$)&$)@*$_)@*_
If only we knew! Then back to your parents who get after you to create a 'profile' in tammatrimony... For the life of me, I am doing no such thing... This at the moment is a state-of-denial almost. But thats where it will be..

The whole process is just that - a process.. with so much propriety involved... 2 families involved - all their hopes on your 'alliance'. The steps in the process -
1) Email
2) Phone call
3) Webcam chat
4) Meet the boy/girl
5) One day later -- 'Enaku indha payyan/ponnu ok' - (*&^%^&$&_{(*_{)(&(@&

HOW?????????? Most people I know answer that question by the usual - "When your time comes, you will know". Thats sooo not helpful at all. I swear now, that when my 'time' comes and I 'know', I will publicize it to help the helpless like me! Lol!